“I AM DROWNING”
Welcome to my tenth entry of Sunday Currently. I want it to be a special one. I want you to go deeper into my thoughts as I go through the ocean of… Depression.
|El Nido, Palawan.
Social media has a pretentious facade of people living perfect lives, specifically my feed. But no, at this season of my life, I am battling with unkind thoughts, haunting past and a silent GOD. That’s right! Shocking, how can someone as cheerful as I am sinking from anxiety?
“The world is needy place, don’t go there for sustenance. Instead, come to Me. Learn to depend on Me alone and your weakness becomes saturated with my Power” – Unknown writer.
Have you ever had moments when you had so much positive energy and enthusiasm yet abruptly it all had been taken away from you? I was shattered (still am), like a mirror awaiting to be fixed again; Empty, like a cracked glass being refilled unconsciously. My dear readers, it all started a month ago, days after a powerful engaging community with leaders and interns of Victory Church Fellowship. I started walking through the darkest valley of shadow, holding on the rope of faith. And suddenly the rope starts to loosen. I fell and tossed in the ocean, trying to survive the current waves, swimming bravely but I was too weak… Cast down underneath a thousand feet with a voice within me… “Jesus, help me.” I cried harder though no one can ever hear me, no one to save me. When depression hits you, it hits you where your faith is built, where your anchor stands. Spiritually, I thought I died in vain.. Only to realize I became blind. Clearly, GOD is with me all along. He is still slowly and gently pulling me upward to the purpose He has for me. A friend of mine said, “Kat, we are going down to the wilderness after being on top of the mountain with our GOD. This is the hardest part of all. Kaya kelangan natin patibayin ang faith and to be there for each other as we pray with one another… You do know that after this, the victory awaits and His glory unveils” I felt somehow relieved knowing I wasn’t alone and the fact that someone is standing in prayer with me.
(Depression gives you an impression that you are alone — don’t listen to it! Look around you, ask for help! Your family and friends loves you, they’re all ears.)
If you simply step forward in faith and believe,
then you will begin to see the miracles that GOD can do in your life.
– Life Application Bible.
… entries from my two favorite blog “Desiring GOD” and “Waiting For Your Boaz”.
😀 I’m glad my friend taught me on how to make these blog a priority on your FB feed when you open the app. IT REALLY HELPS. Disconnect with negative Facebook posts. Oh and I started reading “The Multiplication Challenge” by Pastor Steve Murrell and his son William.
WRITING… notes. Just notes. Need I say more? 😑😑😑
SMELLING… my skin. I just got out of shower. Some lavender scent.
WISHING… I can have another day off. I mean, yeah, quota na ako. 😅 but I need a vacay after a vacay. I guess I needed to be alone for 24 hours, a date with GOD. If only I have the guts to drive off to Tagaytay alone, I would have done it in a heartbeat.
… As everyone in my social media knows, I recently put up my own business page. I still have a lot of promotions to do… I’m hoping you will pray for me for success specifically in glorifying GOD with the talent He has given me. ☺☺☺Yeah, so my dear readers, I will be writing about this soon — for now, Please like my page on Facebook — click here: Styled By KRE
WEARING… My floral tank top and grey bedroom shorts. IT IS SO FREAKING HOT.
LOVING… I don’t have anything to love as of the moment. Nah, just being cheeky. LUL – which means Lame Uncomfortable Laugh. Can you believe how internet slang becomes a fad? Anyway, loving my funny niece expression when she smelled my brother’s icky hotdog pillow. Imagine her dismay. 😝😝😝
NEEDING… 2017 BORACAY getaway by myself. I mean, if you have been reading old entries… You know what Boracay is to me — a second home.
FEELING… Uncertain. A bit hopeful. Depressed. Inadequate. Blessed. I have no idea what I’m feeling right now.
BIBLE VERSE… Never again will you be called “Then Forsaken City” Your name will be “The City of God’s Delight” and “The Bride of GOD,” for the Lord delights in you and will claim you as His bride. – Isaiah 62:4
I’m so glad I finally had the time to write again. Until then, I will be posting about Palawan and Dumaguete trip, as well as COLDPLAY in Manila — oh yes, I did watched them live and I’ve never been to a concert I almost cried next to Back Street Boys of course. 😀
Good night, my dear readers! 💓💓💓
Lots of love! Pray for me too!