A Hundred and Eighty Degree

I had my calling… It may sound strange, but I believe God’s been calling me to serve Him in my daily life.. As you can see, God’s been warning me ever since and I kept ignoring Him. In my 26 years of existence, I can only blab about the material things, I figured it’s the only thing that matters.

I took advantage of those people who dearly loved me. And now I got nothing to be proud of, I don’t have anything except my faith. My choices in life brought me to my downfall, from having debts due to being shopaholic, from heartbroken due to the fact that I wanted to be loved by unwanted lovers, from being forsaken by my so-called friends due to the fact that I took advantage of my real friends. And in less than one year, I lost myself in the grounds of earth.

My father died when I was 19, so as society would describe it, I needed a man figure. I hold on to one guy after another, desperately seeking.. And then I met this man. Figuratively speaking, he’s quite a bad habit, yet he showed me that despite all his issues in life as a 30-something-year old man, he cling to God and that inspired me. Though I go to Baclaran every Tuesday to ask for forgiveness, to pray and light a candle, I still feel the lack of spiritual depth. At those times I seek for self worth yet I got nothing. One of my best girl friend (my mentor as well) showed me the way that God’s so great that He gave her the patience she need in her entire life.. And then one day, I opened my drawer and saw the book “Purpose Driven Life” and yes it all started there. I also attended services at Victory, and believe me in those days I was enlighten, I felt God’s speaking to me every hour. I felt the need to tell Him every feeling, every situation and yes, I cling to Him every now and then. My favorite verse is “I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me”. This verse never fail to help me in daily basis because, in reality, the only constant in my life is GOD. And I praise Him in any given way.

Party girl finds the meaning of life. Nobody really believes me. Louis Vuitton used to make me happy, yet at the end of every pain I encounter, it only reminds me of how lonely I was. I used to be the reigning queen of parties, I used to be that girl who never say no to all kinds of gathering, the girl who throws and spends a lot of money on some parties and shopping malls, the girl who was loved by her so-called friends, yet at some point in time, that girl drifted and they all left her. The thing about this girl now is that she sleeps with a peace of mind. Now she knows her purpose in life, surrounded by her family’s love and understanding from her true friends and making God the center of her life.
Believe me or not, I just want to share how grateful I am to be part of the Christian world. I won’t be a hypocrite to say I don’t like partying anymore, I still do, I still love shopping, I still adore LV, Chanel, Louboutin. I still have dreams, to travel to Greece and Cape Town and buy my very own Subaru Impreza, WRX STI, I still have the wants and needs but I am much eager to live now because I HAVE GOD. So for those who still have issues and worrying in life, why not try opening the Bible or even start your day with a good book like Purpose Driven Life? It’s not too late, it never is. You just gotta let God control your life and you’ll see that those trials, those unpleasant situations are the ones you’d be thankful for… Why? Because they will lead you to Jesus Christ who saved us, and He will show you that this life is only temporary, what matters most is the eternal life you’ll be having.
God bless you all 🙂 

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